Waiting for Perfection

Sitting on the outside, looking in, you oftentimes hear people describe their wedding day or the birth of their child as the best day of their life.  It's hard to understand how one day could be that much different than the other.  I recall thinking, "Yeah, I'm sure you had fun, and I'm sure you were happy... let's talk about me now because I have no way to identify with you on this."

After going through my wedding and honeymoon, I'm excited for all the experiences life will bring in the future.  The level of fulfillment, gratitude, love, excitement, and pure boundless fun, that the day actually entailed was hard to anticipate, amazing to experience, and difficult to articulate.  It truly was the best day of my life and it was so much more than I could have ever expected.  Having all the most important people in your life assembled from all the over the world and seeing the woman of your dreams look more beautiful than she ever has, is something that I didn't even know I was dreaming of, until it actually happened.  When I saw her for the first time, I knew that the day would be fulfilling and emotional beyond anything I expected.

After going through that day and sitting on the precipice of a lifetime with my wife (still weird to say out loud), I realize that the depth and complexity of what we're building is just getting started.  Simply stating our vows and going through the awesome, epic party, of our wedding, added something to our relationship.  Everything is the same, yet totally different.  It feels like we were standing on the summit, admiring the view, content with where we were, only to discover that there's a whole new trail ahead with more meaning, growth, and love.

In reflecting on all that I've been blessed with and the fact that I found something real, something that will last a lifetime, weathering the rockiest of times, I recall a time when I was convinced that I was going to be the awesome, single 50 yr. old uncle.  That would be ok, right?  Life could be great, even though I wanted kids and a family.  I could find fulfillment in traveling, being in great shape, owning awesome stuff, and having great friends, right?

Looking back, this was perhaps the darkest time in my dating history.  I was eating tons of pizza and going out three or four times a week because I believed this was how I would meet someone, when in reality I was just getting greasy and fat.  Ironically enough this was about three weeks before I met Anja.

Sometimes I believe in karma-- dating karma, sales karma, etc.  Perhaps you have to put in the "work" to reap the rewards.  For me, the "work" was failed relationships, laughably bad blind dates (one was totally racist), getting hurt, being a jerk, pledging celibacy, going back on that pledge, all the while praying that waiting for perfection wouldn't result in me dying alone and having my future unnamed dog eat my remains.  Thank God that perfection does exist and patience, mixed with a little faith, is the key.

Here's to building an extraordinary life.